Why I couldn't win Amazing Race. A short essay.

I love the Amazing Race. (Which premieres in 3 days, F.Y.I). I watch it religiously, making sure to add my own opinion or tell Ryan which challenge I would do and which he would have to do. When Ryan and I were first married, we were trying to catch the bus. Ryan said if we ran we could catch it. I wasn't about to run for a bus that shows up every 10 minutes, so I said we will just catch another one. Ryan promptly told me, "This is why we would never win the Amazing Race!"

Well, today, I was eating some roast for dinner. Ryan works nights, so I was eating alone and my mind started to wander. I looked at the roast and thought, hmm, this looks like rhino skin. If I were to make a sculpture of a rhino, roast is a good texture. While I was thinking about this, and chewing my roast, I actually started to gag! Then I thought, that is stupid I know it is roast, but still, I was gagging, my eyes started to water up, and I had to say to myself to just swallow the roast. Then, I started eating my banana, thought of the rhino skin and roast incident, and started to gag AGAIN! These are foods I have had at least on Sunday almost every week of my life... and, that is why I will never win the Amazing Race.